threaded

Snagged

I prefer to downplay the role of art in my life because art isn’t logical.  It’s not sensible, there’s no guarantee it will bring home the bacon.  Surely God has called me to do something more stable with my life.

God isn’t bland.  He’s not safe.  But he’s as steady as a rock.

He told me so just last week.  So then I get pumped feeling like I’m on the brink of some adrenaline spiking adventure, the kind I’ve daydreamed about for years.  And I sit down to write and I slog bravely through a few rough patches.

And then I hit a snag.  And by snag I mean I have suddenly lost all ability to read and write.  The page is colors and symbols and I don’t know what it means.  My adventure becomes worse than mundane.  It’s an illusion.  A happy story I made up when the sun was shining and the birds were singing.

I lose my faith.

The truth is God called me to do this.  I may never see the end result.  It may be too many mundane tasks and hard days to be called an adventure.  But God said, “Write.”  So I’m writing.  Because ultimately all I want is to be working for God.  I work through Him.  I work for Him.  I press on.

What gets you through the mundane or impossible moments?

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7 thoughts on “Snagged

  1. I needed this today, Heather! Totally relate. This gets me: “God isn’t bland. He’s not safe. But he’s as steady as a rock.”

  2. I started smiling when you said that the page was all of a sudden colors and symbols. You are not just a writer. You are a creator. You apparently are called to create in many forms. And, sometimes, God wants you to create and share your gift through writing, but other times, it may be through the art of painting, or art journaling, or collage. . . whatever that may be. He just wants you to share your gift.

    This happens to me frequently. In the middle of writing, I see an image and I need to get it down so that I can paint it later. And, while I’m art journaling, a thought that ignites in my brain gets a story going that I have to tell. I get it down so I can write about it later.

    Just get it down, whatever you see, don’t resist it.

    And, then, you’ll be able to move on with what you are presently creating.

    At least, that’s what helps me. 🙂

    Thank you for sharing your impossible moments. God knows, I have my fair share of them.

    Shari 🙂

  3. sammiebennett on said:

    Heather Lou, I love you and I love this! “My adventure becomes worse than mundane. It’s an illusion. A happy story I made up when the sun was shining and the birds were singing.” Yup. Have SO felt this. Love that you shared your wrestle and your ultimate victory to write through it. 🙂

  4. Heather Ostalkiewicz on said:

    There’s something so powerful about sharing our lives as community! I love it! I just read this post http://www.novelmatters.com/2012/08/who-in-world.html . If you have a second you should check it out:)

  5. Hey Heather! What gets me through is knowing that God has a plan for me. He puts me in these places for a reason and he puts incredible people around me that I can lean on. I try to find something good-even when things are so hard. I find that one good thing (no matter how small) and I cling to it for dear life! Then I just ride it out. There is almost always something God has created for me waiting on the other side! 😉

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